The Ghosts We Carry
Halloween brings talk of ghosts and haunted houses, but the most persistent ghosts don’t float through dark hallways. They live inside us. Old experiences and voices from the past that quietly shape what we believe we can do today.
Think of the promotion that slipped away because someone said you weren’t ready. The early job you barely kept when you were still finding your footing. The boss who once said your work “just wasn’t good enough” in a way that cut so deep you still remember every word. Or the time you pretended you understood a project and spent weeks fearing you’d be exposed. These moments don’t just live in memory. They sink in, telling us to be careful, to think twice, to stay small.
I know the feeling. Early in my career I had a boss who insisted that her way was the only way. When I followed a different process, one I was taught by a previous manager, she told me I was terrible at the job. Even after proving myself in bigger roles, her voice stayed with me. Before major presentations or new projects, I’d hear that echo, questioning whether I really knew what I was doing.
We tell ourselves we’ve moved on, but these ghosts don’t leave easily. They whisper when we hesitate to pitch a bold idea, when we second-guess a tough call, when we quietly lower our own goals. They drain confidence and narrow our future more than we realize.
So what do you do? You bring them into the open. Name the old stories and the doubts they planted. Challenge the messages that no longer belong. Take a step that contradicts your fear. Launch the project, have the conversation, volunteer for the stretch role. Every decisive action weakens their grip.
And you don’t have to do it alone. This is where a coach can make a real difference. A good coach is, in many ways, a professional ghost buster. One who helps you spot the invisible influences from your past, separating fact from fiction, and replacing old voices with strategies and confidence that fit who you are today.
The ghosts of the past may never disappear completely, but they don’t have to run the show. With the right support, you can turn those old stories into fuel and move forward lighter, stronger, and ready for everything ahead.
